Every year, eighth graders from the Lagunitas School take on the challenge of making a change in their community. The issues they choose to tackle range from the tangible, like adding a skate park to the campus, to the intangible, such as the importance of providing targeted mental health services for students. The idea of being a changemaker is central to our middle school curriculum. We want to empower our students to recognize problems in the world around them and have the skills to work toward solutions.
By writing these columns for the Point Reyes Light, we are also encouraging our students to interact with their local newspaper. Fundamental to our students’ understanding of what it means to be an engaged and active citizen is a recognition of the importance of supporting journalism and journalists.
On April 8, award-winning New Yorker staff writer Evan Osnos will speak about the power of journalism and storytelling at the Little Theater at Archie Williams High School. Tickets are available at https://shop.leap4education.org/. This event will be a fundraiser for LEAP, the Lagunitas School foundation, and the eighth-grade trip to Alabama and Georgia to study the civil rights movement and the changemakers who have helped to shape our present and our future.
Mental health and youth
By Mary Akemon
Mental health is an incredibly complex element in my life. I have struggled with anxiety and panic disorder since I was 7, and I haven’t gone a day without it. On the outside, I may seem like a completely normal 14-year-old, but in reality I have been battling a war inside my head. When I was younger, I felt so alone and afraid that something was wrong with me, which only made things worse. It took some time but I finally realized I was not alone. I discovered that many of my friends also dealt with similar feelings; they were different, but it was comforting to know that I wasn’t alone. Ever since then I have been trying my best to educate myself and the people around me about anxiety and mental health.
In my eighth-grade social studies class, we were given an assignment to pick a topic that we felt strongly about, called a Change Project. I chose mental health for my topic because I and others around me have struggled with it. I want to do everything I can to help others feel less alone.
When I was 10, I was petrified of the idea of leaving the house. I was scared to go to school and I didn’t know why. I didn’t know why whenever I went out, the floor underneath me would seem to collapse and my throat would start to close. I didn’t know why my lungs would seem to restrict my breath and I would unaccountably shake. Sometimes it seemed impossible to overcome and I wish I could have told myself then that there are solutions.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, “Anxiety among children aged 6-17 years increased 5.4% in 2003 to 8% in 2007 and to 8.4% in 2011-2012,” and that’s just in youths. If I had known just how many people felt similarly to me when I was younger, and had been able to connect with them, I would have felt less alone. I think that when you’re young and deal with anxiety or any mental illness alone, it can make everything else that much harder, even simple tasks like cleaning your room or making your bed.
Anxiety isn’t just black or white: there are shades of gray. Two people can have anxiety and not relate to each other whatsoever. That’s what makes anxiety so hard and why someone who has it can feel so alone. I struggle with panic attacks and for me that can look like me staring off into the distance and maybe fidgeting a bit, or even hyperventilating, shaking and crying. Just because they can look different doesn’t mean that one is less valid or scary than another. Some people just freeze and others can’t speak when they are having a panic attack. Sometimes there isn’t even a trigger; it just happens, which can make you feel constantly on edge. Some people are scared to leave their own house, which used to be me, but there are solutions.
It took me some time to find the solution that worked for me, which happened to be a mix of therapy and medication. Just because that works for me doesn’t mean that works for everyone, and sometimes it’s not easy to find what works for you. I consider myself lucky because the very first anxiety medication I tried worked. Some people prefer acupuncture or they find that exercise works well for them. There are just about a million ways to anxiety.
For my Change Project, I have connected with Cory, one of the Lagunitas Wellness Center leaders. We created a group that meets in the Wellness Center every Tuesday at lunch. Every week, we talk about a new subject, from anxiety to dealing with divorce. I think this will help students feel more connected and less alone.
The magic of therapy dogs
By Safa Al-Jamal
How many times have we all had a stressful day at work or school, and didn’t realize how much stress was affecting us? Or how many times do you overreact to something small because you were stressed? Either way, I think almost everyone has been in this situation, and I think taking breaks from your stressful day can be relaxing and enjoyable. There are many ways to do this—a walk outside, spending time with friends and family, or the one that often works for me: spending time with animals, especially dogs.
When we are sad, angry or scared, our bodies release stress hormones. These hormones can cause many physical and mental issues and one way to recover and heal from these stressful emotions is through dog therapy. Stress can negatively affect students daily at school and in the real world. Studies show that 80 percent of students feel stressed often, and 34 percent feel depression. The Covid pandemic had a huge impact on so many people, creating a wave of anxiety and depression among people of all ages. Students and teachers have been struggling since we returned to school. Studies show that nine out of 10 students were deeply affected by the school closure and felt more stressed; that’s about 1.5 billion learners in 165 countries.
As part of my Change Project, I recognized that it’s important to me that students at our middle school have the opportunity to have a break from school, and to get a chance to rejuvenate from the difficulties of life. My solution is to invite therapy dogs to campus. Therapy dogs can have an enormous impact on both adults and children. They have helped people with all sorts of disabilities, illnesses and emotional problems. According to Therapy Dogs United, the presence of a therapy dog can reduce blood pressure, assist physical healing, reduce anxiety, fatigue and depression, and offer emotional support.
In sixth grade, I wrote a letter to myself expressing the boredom I felt at home on Zoom, and about how I wanted a pet dog to enjoy and have fun with. I wrote, “I’ve always wanted a pet that would play with me. A pet that I could take on walks or a run. And a pet that I could snuggle with and love. I really want a dog, more than ever.” When I was 11 years old, I wasn’t aware that therapy dogs were accessible to kids my age and younger, and I would have really benefited from their love and compassion. After researching these dogs, I now have a deeper understanding of therapy dogs and their purpose. I have learned that therapy dogs can be for anyone regardless of age or background. I realized how important and beneficial it would be for the students at Lagunitas Middle School to connect with these dogs and experience how healing and rejuvenating they can be.
I have coordinated with Amy Mclntosh to have therapy dogs at our campus once a month. Therapy dogs from the Marin Humane Share Project have been at our school twice already, and so many people enjoyed being with them. It felt so relaxing, calming and enjoyable in their presence. My hope is to have created a safe space for students to take a break from their difficulties and to enjoy time with these dogs.
If you are struggling with anxiety or depression and would like to try working with a therapy dog, here are some resources to check out: https://lovinganimalsprovidingsmiles.org/, https://www.marinhumane.org/above-beyond/community-engagement/animal-assisted-programs/. There are also many ways to get involved by reaching out to the Marin Humane Society.
The loss of women’s health care
By Victoria Anderson-Lynch and
Serenne Fox
As young girls, we are lucky enough to live in a state that will provide us with appropriate reproductive health care should we ever need it. Unfortunately, this is not the reality for millions of women and girls around the country, and every day more of their choices and rights are being taken away.
We are two eighth-grade girls at Lagunitas Middle School. In our social studies class, we get the opportunity to create a project about an issue that is important to us. The goal is to create positive change in our community. For our project, we chose to advocate for women’s health care. We chose this topic because over the course of the past year we have realized that we are living in a reality that thousands of young girls and women across our country can only dream of.
Historically and currently, the majority in the House and Senate has been held by men, and we’ve never had a female president. That is not to say that all men are against abortion and all women are for it, because men can be great allies in these issues. It can be disheartening to know that the groups of people making these decisions about gender-specific health care have historically not worked to have equal representation from both men and women. You can’t help but feel like your body isn’t even in your own hands.
Since the Supreme Court’s overturning of Roe v. Wade, maternal deaths are increasing by 24 percent and one in three women in the United States has lost access to abortion rights. This creates vast amounts of problems for these women. They are being forced to have children they can’t take care of, can’t afford or can’t even survive giving birth to. Brooke Alexander, the 18-year-old Texan who can’t imagine life without her twin girls, was denied the access to an abortion she needed. Becoming a parent changed the course of her life. She had dreams to get a real estate license and enjoy her last teenage years skating with her boyfriend Billy. While she loves her girls endlessly, she can’t help but imagine what life would be like if she had been given a choice. Billy worked a $9/hour job to support them through the first couple of years, and once he got out of school, they decided he would join the Air Force and they would get married so Brooke and the girls would be supported by the extra money and benefits.
Planned Parenthood is a nonprofit organization that provides sexual health care globally. They have over 600 clinics across the country and if you can’t get to one of those locations, they can help you get birth control delivered to your door. They partner with organizations in 12 countries globally to help provide people with the health care they need. They also provide a 24/7 chatbot that will provide quick answers to any questions you may have. As a fundraiser for Planned Parenthood, we have organized a 5K run at the San Geronimo Commons in March.
Social media and body image
Ruby Enclade
We tend to think of social media as a harmless part of our daily lives, but is it really as benign as we think it is? In my social studies class, we choose a topic that we care about and work to make a positive change. For my Change Project, I am focusing on social media and how it affects teens’ mental health and body image.
When teens get into social media, it can become a daily ritual of our lives. Constantly scrolling and scrolling through our social media feed drains our energy and can cause some to have mental health issues as well as problems with how they perceive their body. When teens post something on their social media page, they can get obsessed with things such as likes, views, and comments, which can cause them to think they aren’t good enough or doubt themselves.
I have had a few experiences where I felt not good enough for the beauty standards that social media presents. I know a lot of other teens feel the same way. I got into social media at about the age of 8. That’s a lot younger than most people do. When people get into social media this young, it causes negative long-term effects. During my discovery of social media, I grew to love posting videos and pictures, using fun filters, and scrolling through other people’s videos. However, over time, it started to make me feel kind of bad about myself. With social media, you are constantly trying to look like the people you see. From my experience, I think social media is addictive and even though teens love it, they might not know how much it could be harming them.
I started wondering if any of the other teens in my school have had similar experiences. I surveyed the students about their relationship to social media. When the surveys were returned, I realized that many of my peers were having the same experience. Social media made them feel bad about themselves but they were afraid to stop using it because it is how they connect with their friends.
Social media can have positive and negative effects on teens. For example, according to an article written by the University of Minnesota, during quarantine and social distancing, having social media apps was proven to have a positive impact on teens’ mental health by helping individuals connect socially and slow down the spread of Covid-19 by providing health recommendations. This could be valuable for youth because sometimes it’s hard to find people who have the same interests as you. Although this is a good thing, after researching a lot I found a website with a pros and cons list about social media. The pros were very short and simple answers, but the cons list was detailed and impactful. I do enjoy the positive results of social media that I think a lot of people enjoy. However, when you become addicted to social media, those positive effects start to slip away.
I know that a lot of teens in our community love and enjoy social media for many reasons. You can communicate with friends and family, find new friends and communities, spread news, build your business. However, there are also many reasons why social media can be a threat to youth. This is why I created a group in our school to talk about the issues with social media and have people share their experiences.
Foster care, funding and fixes
By Shelby Felder
Growing up, I am so fortunate to have access to supplies and the support I need to succeed. As I get older, I realize this is not the reality for so many children around me, and I want to do everything I can to help them.
I have never needed to worry about constantly moving or where I will be living next. I can’t imagine how incredibly hard it would be to learn, succeed and be happy if I was also wondering whether my home was safe or was transitioning to a new home or school.
In my social studies class, I get the opportunity to work on a topic that I care about and make a positive change in my community. Nine million children currently live in the foster care system. When you look at this number, what do you picture? These are children whose parents or family members can no longer care for them. There are many reasons this can happen. When children are placed outside their home, they can be separated from their siblings, their community and their culture. So many children in the foster care system are not getting the support they need to grow and learn.
When I started thinking of ways I can make a change in my community, I knew I wanted to help. I decided to do a drive, and since it was nearing the holidays, I decided to host a toy drive at my school. I asked my community for any gently used or new toys or school supplies they may have in their homes. The response was generous, and I was so proud to be a part of this school. I collected 12 bags and boxes filled with toys in good condition, some even brand new. I brought them to the community resource center in San Rafael where they supply families with anything they need free of cost.
During this process, I connected with the organization Marin Foster Care and learned more about what kind of support they needed from me and other community members. Marin Foster Care is a nonprofit that helps children in the foster care system get opportunities and supplies they need to grow. They host drives and parties as well as yearly get-together celebrations, all to better the lives of the youth in the system. Marin Foster Care makes real differences in the lives of children and youth needing love, support and open arms. Eighty is the average number of children in the service of Marin Foster Care, and there are only 35 approved homes for these children.
You can help stock our community resource center with youth toys, clothing and any other supplies needed. You can help stock pantries of foster homes or volunteer at one of the many events Marin Foster Care hosts by filling out an online volunteer form that you can find on the website. Lastly, donating money to Marin Foster Care is greatly appreciated.
We all have challenges throughout our childhoods, but it is very important to reflect on how lucky we are and make an effort to help wherever we can. Until doing this project, I never realized how many opportunities I have been given.
Supporting trans youth
Yuzu F.
According to the National Library of Medicine, 82 percent of transgender individuals have considered killing themselves and 40 percent have attempted suicide. Transgender kids all over the world have a lot to deal with, like bullying, gender dysphoria, getting misgendered, and much more. All of this can take a toll on mental health and cause moderate and severe depression.
I am a transgender individual who has dealt with mental health issues myself. Being trans feels like you’re stuck in the wrong body, but access to gender-affirming care like puberty blockers and hormones can maintain well-being in trans youth. Social support from peers and family is also very necessary. When I came out, I had a lot of support from most of my peers. It felt really amazing knowing that I had people who were supporting me and saw me for who I was. But occasionally I got called slurs and purposely deadnamed, and that affected my mental health a lot. If you don’t know, being deadnamed is when somebody calls a transgender individual by their birth name when they have changed their name as part of a gender transition. I remember I was walking to class one day and somebody purposely yelled my deadname at me, knowing that I had a gender transition. I felt deeply offended and hurt, but I just gave the person the middle finger and walked away. According to one of my friends, that person then started saying things like “trans people aren’t real” and “your gender is the way that you were born.”
I would like to educate people not only at my school but in my community about the transgender community and why preferred names and pronouns are important and why you must respect them. I would also like to educate students at my school that purposely deadnaming and misgendering is never acceptable. I would like to try to stop transphobia and homophobia in my community. I invited a speaker from the Spahr Center to my school to educate about this issue. If people in our community became more educated on this topic and more understanding of the struggles that trans youth go through, our community and schools would be a better and more welcoming place for trans people and the LGBTQIA+ community.
Some experts on this topic are Nikkie Millett and Maggie Pilloton, who work at the Spahr Center in Corte Madera and do a lot of work with LGBTQIA+ youth. Another great person is Jennifer Coutoure, who is a licensed therapist specializing in youth. Last but certainly not least, Kanoa Arteaga has been a transgender activist for years and works with the nonprofit Trans Lifeline. He mostly works around Austin but has done work around the Bay Area.
Protecting our wildlife
By Emily Goodwin
WildCare has helped nurture and support our community and our wildlife since the 1950s. It is now our time to repay their kindness by spreading awareness and making sure that their voice is heard.
For my Change Project, I chose to draw attention to the work of WildCare and how people can support this important organization. One of the biggest things you can do is to spread the word about rodenticides. Read this article and share the information you learned with your friends and family so they can be aware of the tragedy that is rodenticides. If you want to learn about more of the issues that WildCare faces, you can look on the website and learn of the other issues they face.
For all my life, I have lived in the San Geronimo Valley, a place where animals and humans live side by side. As a kid I always loved and respected animals, and now that I am older, I am honored to have WildCare in our community. They provide care to different kinds of animals who become injured or sick either because of contact with humans or an accident or an illness that occurs naturally. Their goal is to return these creatures to nature as soon as they are well enough to survive.
When I was a kid, we had a field trip to WildCare where we got to learn and interact with the animals. At the end, they told us that if we ever see a hurt animal to have a parent call them.
One of WildCare’s biggest projects since 2006 concerns rodenticides. Many rodenticides contain anticoagulants, a toxin that prevents blood from clotting. And since 2011 to 2014 they started doing very intense research on the rodent-eating animals that came in, looking for exposure to anticoagulant rat poison. They found that 76 percent of the animals that got tested had some trace of rat poison in their system.
In 2020, Governor Newsom signed a moratorium on their use in California so you can’t buy them in stores but they are often still available online, which is a loophole that needs to be fixed. Almost everyone in the valley has had rats in their home at one point in time, and a lot of people resort to poisons because they think they will be an easy fix. In reality, it doesn’t just kill rats; these toxins move up the food chain and affect owls and other predators. If people have a rat problem, they can use electric traps or snap traps, and make sure all holes in their homes are closed up and that food and compost are in airtight containers. These efforts will reduce rats and mice without harming any other predators in the food chain.
Please help support WildCare by donating to them, coming to my drive in the office at Lagunitas Middle School, or spreading the word about the effects of poisons on the animals with whom we share this beautiful part of the world.
Combat climate change in your own backyard
By Vesper Klausner and Reese Patton
Climate change is a looming hazard that threatens us all. News of melting icecaps, burning forests and vanishing wildlife can make us feel helpless. How can we, as regular civilians, shape up against a global nightmare? Many of us have fallen into this same negative spiral too many times to count. What if we told you there was a simple way to combat climate change in your daily life? All it starts with is a single seed.
Native plants strengthen local gardens and communities while also supplying the essential nutrients and vitamins to flora and fauna all around. They improve air quality and prevent flooding and landslides in the area they are planted. Nationally, 70 million pounds of pesticides are applied to lawns each year. The pesticides not only harm plants and animals, but also contaminate rivers and creeks. Native plants require no fertilizer or pesticides, while also decreasing pollution by the lack of heavy machinery. Native plants have evolved naturally in indigenous regions, and without them, animals that co-evolved with them would not be able to survive. Native plants ensure thriving environments and healthy ecosystems.
As young people in the world today, climate change is always in the back of our minds. When the planet reaches its breaking point, our generation will be responsible for picking up the pieces. My name is Vesper Klausner. I have seen firsthand how global warming affects the environment. When I was 9, I visited Kenai Fjords National Park, located just outside the small fishing town of Seward, Alaska. My family decided to take a trip to see the famed glaciers that the park is known for. The guides pointed out where the glacier had previously reached. It was hard for me to understand how quickly the glaciers were receding. Exit Glacier has lost more than half its size in the past 10 years, and Bear Glacier has lost almost as much in the past five. This poignant memory stuck with me as a constant reminder of what we have lost. When this project was introduced, I knew at once that this was something l was ready to tackle. I knew I didn’t have the resources to make a drastic change, so I downscaled my ideas to the size of our community. Over the summer, l read a book that changed my entire view on the environment, “Braiding Sweetgrass” by Robin Wall Kimmerer. It placed indigenous plants into the spotlight, and at once I knew what I wanted to do.
Native plants are the champion of any local garden. Thousands of years of evolution have primed them for peak survival. In California, we have seen increasingly long periods of droughts followed by heavy rains, and we now refer to late summer and fall as “fire season.” Indigenous species can adapt and evolve with the changing climate. Non-native species can require more water and add fuel to the scourge of wildfires. The deeper roots of native species help the soil retain more moisture, and they require less water to survive once they are established. According to the E.P.A., maintaining a native environment over a 20-year period will cost about $1,700 less than a non-native garden. With rising inflation, a self-sustaining environment will be a much smarter choice. As well as being healthy for your wallet, an indigenous garden will also benefit the ecosystem. They nurture not only local bees and butterflies, but essential microorganisms that will boost the well-being of your soil.
At the beginning of our journey, we began contacting local native plant sellers and people we believed could help conserve native plants. One really stuck out to us: a local business owner, Stephane Gregoire. We contacted him from a native plants page on Twitter and he said he would be happy to help us! Immediately we constructed a chart full of all the native plants suitable to our area. We wanted to nurture local pollinators and help each and every one thrive. Stephane helped us pick the best and most beneficial from our list. Outside of our social studies classroom, we found an unused concrete planter box, and at once we had a plan. We cleared the soil and put in essential mulch needed to help the plants grow. Stephane brought pitcher sage, coyote mint, yarrow, evening primrose and much more. We planted each one until the small garden was filled with native plants. We formed a nest-like bowl around each plant to further help it gather water, and our job was done.
Many people believe that you need a certain amount of impact or publicity to make a change in the world. They think that whatever they do on the planet, here and now, won’t matter because their actions don’t make a change. However, they are wrong. Big change doesn’t happen all at once. It happens incrementally, people planting native gardens, avoiding single-use plastics, riding a bike or walking instead of driving. Every day we have the opportunity to make climate-conscious decisions. It might seem like your changes aren’t helping, but they really are, even if you can’t see it happening. Perhaps you plant a tree, or plant a garden. You might think these actions mean nothing, but in all actuality the ecosystems are thriving, because of you. All you need to do is get a different perspective, a shovel, a native plant, and you are making a change.
My experience with cancer
By Samantha Ott
For as long as I can remember, someone I love has been battling cancer. I know how hard it is to not only see your loved one suffering, but to feel useless not knowing how to help. Cancer is a disease that can attack anyone no matter your age, class, or race. The aggressive spreading cells ambush your system and use up the body’s energy supply. It’s very dangerous, especially because some cancers don’t have cures.
In my social studies class, we had the opportunity to make a change in our community. I wanted to find a way to help or support those fighting against cancer.
When I was little, I would point out the big bump in my dad’s arm. He would joke with me and say it was his muscles. Little did we know that it was a liposarcoma, a very rare type of cancer that starts in fat cells. It forms in the layer of fat right under the skin or in the deep soft tissues. It was very dangerous and my parents had just found out he had it the day we moved to Marin. The second time my dad had cancer was in October 2021. He had melanoma in his upper back. Melanoma is when pigment-producing cells become cancerous. It usually shows as moles. He had surgery on Halloween for it to be taken out, I was worried. Right now he’s healthy and still has struggles with his arm from radiation but he is happy and we’re all so lucky.
My grandfather had many health struggles over his lifetime and his body was very weak but it stayed strong for a long time. He had prostate cancer for 26 years without metastasis until the end, when it spread all the way to his brain. He passed away last year because of how tired and worn out his body was from the aggressive cancer. It was hard to see how it changed his thoughts and mind. My grandfather wasn’t present anymore and didn’t make much sense, even though I could see that he wanted to be. He was a very important man in my life and was the reason I started to love music and playing instruments. I miss him so much and will always remember him as a supportive role model.
Last year, my uncle, who’s also my best friend, was diagnosed with stage-four prostate cancer at only 38 years old. It was caught late and had metastasized all over his body. It spread up his spine, through his bones all the way to his skull. He was given one year to live. My uncle’s prostate-specific antigen (PSA) was a 310, when the normal range is between under 1.5. After research, he found N.I.H., the nation’s largest hospital committed to clinical research. They have unusual treatments and new experiments that have gotten him so much better; it’s a miracle. Doctors are surprised how much healthier he is. My uncle’s PSA now is 0.01. He now has a much brighter future. I love him so much and am always grateful for the time I get to spend with him. He’s always going to be one of my favorite people.
Hard treatment, tough side effects, the constant anxiety—I have seen how it takes a toll on my whole family. The heartache and fear that you might not be with a family member or friend in the end. I knew I had to make a change and help in some way. I’ve been volunteering for Cancer Kids First by making cards for kids with cancer. I’ve seen how hard it is for a grownup with cancer and I couldn’t imagine how tough it would be for an adolescent. I wanted to put a smile on someone’s face, as knowing I can put a smile on a kid’s face makes my heart even happier.
Feb. 4 is World Cancer Day. It falls on a Saturday, so on Feb. 3 I am going to have an assembly at our school to help educate my peers about how they can support people and their families who are suffering from cancer. We will make cards for kids with cancer, as well as learn about cancer and its effects on your body. There are many options for volunteering and you don’t have to be an adult to do it. The link to make this possible is https://www.cancerkidsfirst.org/get-involved. I hope that by doing this, I can make an impact for other kids to care about something that is so important not only to me, but hopefully to them as well.
I would never want anybody to lose what I’ve lost. I want to work to make the lives of people with cancer better and I hope that I can achieve that by the end of this school year. Making a difference and putting a smile on someone’s face is so important, especially if they’re going through a tough time.
The high cost of horseback riding and a deeper look into the sport
By Camilla Koons and Coral John
Many sports have a high financial cost to participate in. Some sports, like ice hockey, skiing and horseback riding, are even more expensive due to travel and the cost of gear. The financial struggle that comes along with horseback riding has held people back from joining or continuing with the sport.
We met over a year ago at a local horse show. For our Change Project, we decided to raise awareness around the often prohibitively high cost of horseback riding, and we worked to try and make it less of a burden for families. We collected gently used gear and worked with Marin Tack and Feed in Forest Knolls to collect gear that will be distributed by https://www.equikids.org/. We also volunteered with Halleck Creek Ranch, which brings people together who have challenges and disabilities to ride horses on trails “to live a life without barriers.” To us, riding is a big part of our lives and a full commitment. Just being around horses means more than anything to us.
I’m Camilla Koons, 13 now, and I’m beyond grateful for the hard work my parents have put in to be able to have me in riding. If I told you it’s been easy with money while riding, it would be far from the truth. When I was 8, I decided to start riding regularly. Even at only a few months old, I said my first word, “caballo,” which means “horse” in Spanish. As an 8-year-old who knew nothing about riding, I was determined to become a good rider. Switching between barns trying to find the right fit was a hassle.
In 2019, I found the Creekside Equestrian Center, the barn I knew was going to help me grow as an athlete. Working up from scratch took time, patience and determination. Currently I ride four times a week, jumping regularly. Six months ago, my family bought our first horse, named Riley. This all would not have been possible without my outstanding trainer. I couldn’t be more grateful for every opportunity and goal my family has helped me reach.
My name is Coral John. I am 13 and have been riding since I was 8 years old. Though riding has already been such an amazing experience and will continue to be an amazing experience, it does not come without a cost. The hard reality of horseback riding is facing the fact that you won’t get anywhere without the money. I’m so unbelievably grateful that I have been able to get to this point as an equestrian. When I first asked my parents about taking horseback riding lessons, they said no because they were nervous about the cost. However, that all changed when I met a woman walking a horse named Lulu. She said I could ride Lulu and help take care of her for free. When my parents saw how much I loved riding and was helping with Lulu, they let me start taking lessons. I now ride twice a week and I couldn’t be happier.
A lot of people don’t see riding as a sport, but in reality riding in the Olympics was officially ranked the hardest sport in 2013. We want people to see riding for what it truly is. Horseback riding is a healing sport, a therapy that lowers blood pressure and builds strength and the rush of adrenaline that runs through your veins when riding is an unforgettable feeling.
Not only is riding fun, but it has more to offer than what an outside eye would see. If we can help get more people riding by supplying the clothing and riding gear, we will do everything in our power to do so. That’s why we have gathered an estimated 350 items to donate to people in need.
Arriving at the barn with the mindset that this will take an hour at max is an understatement. A lesson and going through the full routine takes about three hours. Add the additional endless hours of sitting with your horses when they are hurt, caring for them, getting them out of their stalls and making sure they have everything they need 24/7.
Actively, 3.5 million people ride horses in the world today. The average cost of a horseback riding lesson is around $75 an hour. If you were to have a lesson once a week for a month, it would add up to $300 alone. That’s without the cost of boots, breeches, gloves, and a helmet, which all together could add up to at least $200. And if you are interested in owning your own horse, the cost for feed, boarding, health care, and accessories could be thousands of dollars more, and that’s after the initial cost of the horse. Just taking part in horseback riding is a big commitment, physically and financially.
Not until we started taking lessons regularly did we understand how much time this sport requires. We have both learned more from this sport than we ever imagined was possible.
If you want to help out at Halleck Creek Ranch, we encourage you to check out their website, https://halleckcreekranch.org/, to donate or volunteer.
The problem of homelessness in Marin
By Izzy Rivera and Avila Pardini-Bush
My name is Izzy Rivera. When I was younger, my family was struggling and there were times when I feared that we would be unhoused. My mom was in college at the time, so it was hard to get a good-paying job and childcare and still attend all of her classes. When she graduated, we went to live with my grandparents and she started working really hard to get us into a better situation. After a few years of her working for a few different businesses, she created her own business, which is doing tremendously well. Now I am lucky enough to not have to worry about having enough food, clean water, heating or having a roof over my head. But I know this is not the reality for so many families in my community.
In our social studies class, we are doing a project where we choose a topic and make a change. My classmate Avila Pardini-Bush and I chose to help the unhoused. We both truly care about this topic and know how serious it is. I chose this topic because of my personal experience with it. When my mom was in college, we had to sleep on her friends’ couches for a little while. She worked so hard to get back up on her feet and we now live in the first house she has ever bought. I feel thankful for the experience because it taught me to be grateful for the things I have and to have empathy for struggling families.
My name is Avila Pardini-Bush, and while I am lucky enough to be comfortable in my own home and to not need to worry about food, water or even warmth, 74 percent of people in Marin are living far from that reality. I started to notice at a young age that not everyone had the advantages that I had, but I don’t think I really realized how hard it was to not have access to the stability that I took for granted. I first became aware of homelessness when my mom and I volunteered at St. Vincent De Paul in San Rafael. When I was young, I didn’t recognize that it could make someone feel so good knowing that they helped a person in need that day. Now I realize how grateful I am to have had the experience of helping.
We researched and found a food kitchen where we could donate bagged lunches. First we made a list of groceries. Then we talked to our families and got donations to pay for the sandwich ingredients and snacks. Next we made 50 bagged lunches and donated them to the St. Vincent De Paul food kitchen so they could give them to people in need. It was a great experience and we had fun getting to help people.
People can also volunteer at local food banks. Lots of communities have at least one food bank where you can help distribute food among people. Another thing you can do to help is making hygiene kits or do a hygiene drive. Hygiene kits are a simple way to help some people that may not be able to access necessary hygiene supplies. You could also do a drive to collect hygiene supplies and find a shelter to donate them to. One last idea is to do what we did. You could find a shelter or any other place that would disperse bagged lunches.
Countless families have to worry about their next shower, meal, or even drink of water. People you know could have these worries and you don’t even know about it. Luckily, there are many ways to help families in need, like volunteering at a local food bank or food kitchen. We hope others can recognize how important this issue is and choose to take action.
The importance of consent
By Isobel Scheinost
Every 68 seconds, someone in America is sexually assaulted. This statistic is from RAINN, the U.S.’s most prominent sexual assault prevention organization. When people think of consent, they often regard it as a purely sexual topic. However, it is something we often teach as early as preschool, as the idea that one’s boundaries need to be respected to preserve healthy relationships. In its most basic form, consent is about respect for others. Hands to yourself, don’t take what’s not yours, and don’t call people names. My peers and I have been taught some version of this since preschool. So why as we get older is it such a widely ignored subject?
Every year, the eighth-grade class of Lagunitas School picks an issue or subject that is significant to them. They become experts on the topic and make a change for the better within their community. For me, this meant educating people on consent and why it’s crucial to the prevention of sexual assault.
Often we teach people how to not get assaulted. Children, especially girls, are taught hundreds of tactics and precautions on how to prevent the possibility of assault. Yet we do not teach our children the proper skills needed to respect boundaries and listen to no’s when they are given.
The first time I was catcalled, I was 11 years old, walking down the street with my friends. When we are young, we sometimes hear older women talk about catcalling and harassment, but we never expect to experience it ourselves. So when my friend and I walk down the street, we are not prepared. When cars slow, we are not prepared. When we are whistled, laughed, and winked at, we are not prepared.
How do you explain to your child what is happening in a situation like that? How do you explain to your child that someone was using their body as some sort of conquest, trying to make them uncomfortable within their own skin? Statistically, one in nine girls and one in 53 boys under age 18 experiences sexual abuse or assault at the hands of an adult. You can’t ignore it, no matter how much you want to. We cannot teach our children that it is normal and we cannot be depending on the victim to prevent it.
We have taught people that this is just the way of the world. We are told that it’s better than it used to be, so we should settle down and ignore it. When we teach this, we are perpetuating that not only is it okay to catcall, harass, and assault people, but that the victim should be quiet and ignore it because it is their fault and they are overreacting.
We often focus on preventing sexual assault immediately before it happens, on self-defense, tasers, and other tactics. While that is important, we should also address the issues at the source, and it is much easier than you might think. Teach both boys and girls about consent and respect your children’s boundaries. Teach youth that their voice matters in every setting. This is how we prevent sexual assault before it even happens. Change our mindset around consent. It belongs in every environment, not just sexual or romantic. You can address your mindset around consent and the word “no” itself. Train yourself to know that “no” is not an inherently bad thing. If someone does not want something, that’s personal to them and not you.
The sexual assault hotline is 1-800-656-4673. The suicide hotline is 988. The national domestic abuse hotline is 800-799-7233.
The problem of academic stress and anxiety
By Ella Signor
There is no way that students can excel in school while they are fighting a mental battle in their head. My name is Ella Signor. I am an eighth-grader at Lagunitas Middle School. In my social studies class, we get the opportunity to make a positive change in our community. This is a year-long assignment called a Change Project. Throughout the school year, we figure out solutions to our problems and work to change things in our community. This project lets us educate our community and ourselves on problems we feel passionate about. For my Change Project, I wanted to tackle the issue of how everyday stress affects your academic performance and how overbearing academic stress can be. I wanted to encourage students to talk about their problems and give students resources and solutions.
Throughout my three middle school years, I have become obsessed with perfect grades and being a great student. Little did I know that this would affect my focus in classes and my work. Recently, I have been extremely stressed and have been struggling to pay attention in class and socialize. I dread going to school almost every day because I don’t know what that day will bring. One day in class, we were talking about upcoming things and I felt my chest kind of close; I was having some trouble breathing, but I didn’t want to tell anyone. I felt like if I did, I would be perceived as too weak or not smart enough.
Academic stress doesn’t just affect how we behave and interact at school, but also how we live our lives. I constantly stress about school. Whether I have my work done, or if my work is even good enough. I feel that I can’t do anything but work in my time outside of school. These feelings inspired me to choose this topic and attempt to help this problem.
My first step was to survey my middle school to find out if other kids were experiencing these feelings. I didn’t know how greatly this affected people until I looked at the results. So many of my peers experience significant stress related to school. In addition, the majority of them didn’t want to talk about it to anyone, for fear of being judged or perceived as dumb. About 71 percent experience significant academic stress, and about 65 percent of students don’t talk about their stress because they don’t want to be judged by their peers.
I found out that many students didn’t know how to handle their stress. For one of my actions, I wanted to introduce ways to cope with stress. I am hoping to bring in someone from Bambini Yoga Project. This organization works to empower youth through movement. They help students learn techniques so they can better navigate their social and academic challenges. I am also hoping to bring in someone from the Mindful Life Project, a local nonprofit that works to transform schools through social-emotional-based teaching. I would like to bring in this organization to help our teachers learn how to incorporate mindfulness into their classroom. I feel this will be beneficial for both the students and teachers, and will carry on after I graduate.
I believe that schools should be better equipped with resources to help students with stress. So many students at my school struggle with extreme stress surrounding school, but they feel as if they can’t tell anyone. If people don’t feel comfortable talking about it, I want them to be equipped with the tools to help themselves. Every person can contribute to making a difference, either by normalizing conversations about stress, academically focused or not. If you know someone who is in school, make sure they know they are supported. We need to make it acceptable in our society to open up and share what we are feeling. We need to make sure there is a safe and inviting community that is open to us for help.
The first step that parents can take is to initiate a conversation with their kids. It can be difficult for the kid to begin the conversation because they might not know where to start or the parent’s possible reaction. The parent’s job is to simply listen, and not make the conversation about them. The kid is being vulnerable and sharing what they are going through. Try to be empathetic and understand where they are coming from. Make sure the kid knows that you are listening to them and will support them no matter what. For a parent of a kid going through anxiety and stress surrounding school or life in general, it would be beneficial to do some research. By researching, you can become more comfortable with the topic and might be able to help your kid more sensitively.
Stress and anxiety from school is very common, but that doesn’t make it less important. Middle schools should prioritize their students’ mental health because this age is a perfect time to prepare for the great stress and anxiety that comes with moving on. This is a perfect age to help students learn tools to help them cope with stress and anxiety, and I hope my project will help students realize that they are not alone.
The toxic effects of diet culture
By Mia Wilhelm
As a teenage girl, I see all sorts of things on social media about bodies. Even in magazines in grocery stores with headlines like “Lose half the weight…without trying!” or “Fat? Tired? Lose 5lbs in 7 days just by using a new weight loss vitamin!” It can be misleading to both girls and boys. Being thin, being attractive, having abs—these are the things that society teaches us are important. This can cause body-image issues and intense self-hatred. There have been steps to make body positivity more prominent. Body positivity is a social movement focused on the acceptance of all bodies, regardless of size, shape, skin tone, gender, and physical abilities, while challenging present-day beauty standards as an undesirable social construct. Even with the changes we are making, it’s hard to look past diet culture and beauty standards, sometimes even impossible. With so many resources promoting dieting, eating disorders have become a part of our world.
Bringing awareness to eating disorders is important to me, as I have known so many people who have struggled with them. This is why I set up a parent education night to educate parents on eating disorders and how to notice signs before it gets dangerous to their child or loved one.
I have dealt with bad body image and negative self-talk for a pretty long time. There are many types of eating disorders but the ones most talked about are anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa and BED (binge-eating disorder). They can be deadly and damaging if not caught early. Most people who experience eating disorders are extremely critical of themselves. They often measure self-worth by the number on the scale. But with the right help, recovery is possible. It’s a marathon, not a sprint.
After various research I got a better idea of how hard it can be to handle one. It can be hard for families as well. Eating disorders can affect all ages, races, genders, and all body shapes and weights. One of the biggest misconceptions is that you can tell if someone has a disorder by their weight. Someone who is considered “healthy” or at a normal weight can have an eating disorder, including severe ones that damage their long-term health in invisible ways. Eating disorders are a mental disorder. Usually eating disorders stem from a disruption to someone’s self-perception.
Eating disorders can sneak up on a family and be hard to deal with. When someone loses weight due to an eating disorder, not only do they lose body weight but also brain weight. This can affect the emotional centers of the brain, leading to depression, irritability, and isolation. It can be extremely scary and hard to deal with an eating disorder, but if you know what to look for you could potentially save a loved one.
Approximately 30 million Americans live with an eating disorder, and 10 million men will suffer from an eating disorder in their lifetime. And about one person dies every hour as a direct result of an eating disorder. Certain treatment options to help are available, but treatment can be expensive. With good medical insurance it can be easier to get the right help. Treatment options include talk therapy, nutritional therapy, expressive arts therapy, and, if needed, hospitalization. Not all people with eating disorders have to be hospitalized. When looking for a therapist, find one who specializes in eating disorders.
Diet culture’s emphasis on body shape, size and appearance are serious contributors to negative body image. Bad body image can cause negative thoughts, feelings, and perceptions about your appearance. With so much pressure to look a certain way, eating disorders become a dangerous reality, but there are ways to help and recovery is possible. But with the right tools you can notice signs of an eating disorder and help your loved one. Not everyone with an eating disorder looks a certain way. Eating disorders can affect all ages, races, genders, and all body shapes. We need to work together to help people live safely inside their own bodies no matter who they are.
Environmental benefits of e-bikes
By Leif Carew
I am an eighth grader at Lagunitas School taking part in our Change Project. I want to raise awareness of the benefits of using bikes or e-bikes. I like dirt biking because it is a fun activity. It is very enjoyable, and dirt biking can also be a form of transportation. However, e-bikes are more realistic as a form of transportation for many.
The benefits of e-biking are that it’s eco-friendly and does not produce harmful emissions, and it is a form of exercise that is good for your health. A e-bike can reach up to 15 miles per hour and batteries can last up to five hours.
There are some negatives: e-bikes are fairly expensive and heavy and if the battery gets ruined, they are expensive to replace. I would encourage people to look into getting an e-bike.
A five- to 10-hour-old oil change schedule is what the majority of two-stroke (gearbox oil) and four-stroke engine riders abide by, and it’s what we recommend sticking to. Oil change intervals every five to ten hours provide an even balance between cost and good practice of bike engine maintenance.
A company called Vattenfall and a Swedish company called Cake are working on a low-carbon, fossil-free e-bike that is scheduled to be released in 2025. Their goal is to enable fossil-free living within a generation. To become fully fossil-free, all materials and components from steel, plastic suspension and the battery must be produced and transported. The founder of Cake is Stefan Ytterborn and the founder of Vattenfall is the Swedish government. When the bike is on the road, it will be running on renewable electricity. Its emissions are close to zero, but as much as 80 percent of its lifetime comes from just making the bike, from the production of the materials to their transport and assembly. The current carbon footprint of the bike is calculated as 1,186kg CO2e as the size of the cube in which the bike’s suspended. The goal is to ultimately get rid of the carbon dioxide output. According to Swedish publication Sverige, “Sweden is known for its undeveloped wilderness and archipelagoes, stretching from the European mainland to the Arctic. Meeting the environmental challenges of the future is not just about protecting landscapes, though, and Sweden is making big strides towards safeguarding the future as well as conserving the past.”
The e-bike is very important to me because our current carbon footprint produced by bikes is too large. A large Co2e footprint leads to global warming, the process by which gasses go up into the atmosphere and block heat from leaving. This becomes a problem for many gas-powered bikes. If too many fossil fuels get into the atmosphere, it will melt all the ice, causing sea levels to rise and flooding all coastal cities on the planet.
The e-bike is better for the environment because it does not produce fossil fuels. Switching to an e-bike alternative would lessen environmental impacts and play a big part in reducing global warming.
The hidden danger of the internet
By Selim Bishay
As a 14-year-old boy living in the 21st century, I have been around technology and the internet for as long as I can remember. It was always a source of infinite pleasure to me, but now I have seen a far, far darker side to the devices that I once admired.
It was September 2021 when I had my first glimpse of identity theft. I was listening to Spotify when I got a message on my phone that read: “Hello Selim, your Amazon account is ready to be redeemed. If you want to redeem click this link below,” or something like that. Immediately, I was suspicious so I went to my dad, who explained that the message was a scam and that I should just forget about it. However, on June 8, 2022, something similar would happen, except this time there was nothing I could do about it.
When I came home from school that day, my dad told me that my grandmother had been scammed and was in serious trouble. She had just settled into a quiet retirement and was definitely not expecting to have her entire life ruined in a few short minutes. Her bank account, address, credit card details, passwords, even her I.D. were all sold on the dark web and released to every hacker and scammer on the planet.
This newfound information deeply disturbed me, mainly because I realized that this could happen to me or anyone I know at any time. I became hyper-focused on my own security. I installed V.P.N.s and got the best antivirus software. I decided to try to help people avoid the suffering and stress caused by the heartless scammers whose job it is to ruin people’s lives.
To address this problem, I needed a starting point. So I asked my father, Shereef Bishay, who is an expert in these issues because of his experience working at Microsoft and other tech companies. Immediately we started brainstorming ideas to try and solve this global problem. Our ideas ranged from creating a website to a full-fledged business. Eventually we decided that to start we should just hold a workshop at the San Geronimo Valley Community Center on Feb. 17 at 5 p.m. to warn people about identity theft and help them understand the tools that can protect them.
This is a topic that I feel very passionate about because watching my grandmother fear that she had lost everything was awful. I don’t want anyone else to ever have that experience and I want people to have access to the tools and knowledge they need to protect themselves.
The crisis facing men and boys
By Leo Anderson, Eric Conroy, Jasper Adams, and Eric Conroy
Men’s mental health is a subject that many people aren’t comfortable discussing. There are not very many boys in our class, so we feel it is even more important for us to highlight that our mental health needs may be different than the needs of our female peers.
Men’s mental health is often overlooked in our society, where men of all ages feel like they can’t share their emotions or that they will be deemed as “unmanly” or “weak.” We thought that we should do more than just teach young people about mental health, so we decided to take action. We began by doing a survey of how students felt about mental health. We have helped teach the students at Lagunitas healthier ways to talk about their feelings by having them fill out anonymous surveys on how they feel mental health is dealt with in our society. We educated each student on healthy ways to improve their mental health and how to openly express their feelings without feeling alone or different. On Jan. 13, we brought in a man named Kevin Briggs, who is well educated on this topic. You may know him from the famous photo of the police officer convincing the depressed man to not take his life on the Golden Gate Bridge. Kevin has helped many people with their mental health over the years and prevented numerous suicides. We believe these actions help educate and avoid mental health issues.
A recent survey from Zurich showed that 38 percent of males don’t feel comfortable expressing their emotions. This study aligns with our own experiences. The pandemic also gave us more time to think about this subject and witness the lack of awareness around adolescent mental health and boys in particular. We would like to raise awareness of this issue and help normalize talking about it. These are some other troubling truths about men’s mental health. SSM Health states that suicide rate is the highest in middle-aged men. An article posted by CNN shows that less than one in five men have contact with mental health professionals. In the U.S., one man commits suicide every 14.4 minutes, while females commit suicide every 55.9 minutes, according to a study from Save.org. A study from the C.D.C. says men make up 49 percent of the population, but 80 percent of suicide rates.
My name is Eric Conroy. The first time I remember thinking about my mental health was two years ago, when I lost my grandmother. At first, I didn’t know how to deal with my grandmother’s death. This was a difficult time for me. I eventually found my own ways: I played a lot of basketball and talked to my family about how much I missed my grandmother. The reflection of positive memories I shared with my grandmother helped me think of her life as something to be celebrated. Another way I comforted myself was the thought that my grandmother was one of the nicest people I’ve ever known. I knew she would definitely be going to heaven. This experience made me realize how important it is to have good mental health.
My name is Jasper Adams, and three years ago, Covid-19 hit the country hard, along with my household. This was the most difficult time in my life. I had no energy or motivation to do anything. I was getting minimal exercise and I was eating because I was bored. I had relied on my friends and teachers while transitioning from elementary school to middle school, yet in this time, both of those were stripped away. I was depressed and isolated. I felt like things would never be the same. As things began to return to normal, I got more exercise and I was eating healthier. My mental health was quickly improving as I had more contact with the people who supported me. I came to understand that for my own well-being, I need exercise and connections to my friends. I wish that before the pandemic I had understood that there were things I could do to protect myself from depression and isolation.
My name is Oliver Arnold. In sixth grade, my face started getting weird red spots called acne, and as I got older it only got worse. All throughout middle school, I have been insecure about my acne and how it looks. I have taken thousands of medicines for it, but it seems like nothing works. Feeling self-conscious about my appearance has made me anxious and unsure of myself. Even when I do something well or get positive feedback from a coach or a teacher, I still feel like I am not really good enough. I have worked hard to remind myself that it is what’s on the inside that really matters. Working on this project has reminded me that there are things I can do to help myself feel better when I am down.
My name is Leo Anderson. In 2021, I lost two pets, one a three-month-old cat and one a dog. This was obviously a hard time for me, and on top of that it happened during the lockdown. The cat’s name was Bob. My mom and I had adopted him from the Marin Humane shelter. He was very young when we adopted him and only a few months after the adoption he ran out of the house when my mom was trying to put him in his crate to go in the car. We looked for him for about a week, but after that we assumed the worst. My dog was named Oliver. He was in his late teens, so he wasn’t really old for a dog. Luckily, he passed away in his sleep due to natural causes, but this was still very hard for me and my family. During all of this I had to keep up with things like schoolwork and after-school activities, so I didn’t really have much time to cope. I felt like I wasn’t able to share my emotions with others because I thought it wasn’t normal to show these emotions as a male. This is a big reason why I thought it would be a good idea to join in on the men’s mental health project. After this hardship, I learned that playing sports with my friends and spending time with family helps me maintain good mental health and overall happiness.
Racism in Marin
By Amanda Trinidad-Benito
Many of you may not experience racism or notice the subtle ways in which people can express it. However, as a person of color in Marin, I experience it almost every time I am in public.
Once, my sister and I went out and we walked into a store. Right when we got there, I could feel so many eyes on me. I thought it was just me that felt that way, but when I asked my sister, she said she felt the same way. When we got to the register, the lady in front asked if we were sure we could pay and if we had enough money. My sister is 18, so the woman wasn’t asking us that because we were kids. She was asking us that because we aren’t white.
That wasn’t the only time that something like that happened, but at that time I was young and didn’t know what she meant. People look at me whenever I go into an expensive store. I am often followed as if I’m going to steal something or do something bad.
It’s important for people to understand and know how that feels, because there have been many occasions where people harm themselves or commit suicide because of this. I hear a lot of people making all types of racist jokes like if it won’t affect no one, but in reality, it can hurt many people of color.
In my eighth-grade class we are choosing a topic which we feel strongly about. We work to make a change in the world that is meaningful. I chose anti-racism. I brought in a group of students from the Archie Williams STAAR program. They are students who train in doing anti-racism work with both adults and kids. They did an assembly at my school and talked to us about how we can talk to each other in a way that encourages openness and respect.
In Marin County, the four largest ethnic groups are white (non-Hispanic) at 70.6 percent), other (Hispanic) at 7.27 percent, white (Hispanic) at 6.09 percent, and Asian (non-Hispanic) at 5.7 percent. Where I live in my neighborhood, it is almost entirely white. Currently, I’m one of four non-white students in my middle school. I went to an all-Hispanic preschool and I got used to speaking Spanish to my teachers and peers, so when I started kindergarten it was odd because most of the teachers and peers were white. Sometimes I felt left out because I could never fit in with the other students in my class. After a while I got used to it and met a few friends who understood and helped me gain my confidence.
Every time I am out with either my parents or siblings, we can be a target for racism. Racism has a massive negative impact on mental health. It can cause ongoing feelings of sadness, anger, depression, being left out, headaches, increased heart rate, and not wanting to go to school or go out in public at all because you fear what’ll happen to you. My goal is for people to better understand what it can be like to be a minority; then they might be more understanding and compassionate when they see a family like mine.